My First Meeting
“Again, I was able to recognise that I had always been powerless over alcohol.”
I had never heard of Alcoholics Anonymous but knew that my drinking was totally out of control and affecting the lives of others around me. What could I do to stop or even control drinking? I had tried everything and none of it worked. I was resigned to an early grave; the sooner the better.
Then one day I came to and got the fright of my life. I gradually realised I was in the local mental hospital.
“Oh well this is it now, I’ll be here for the rest of my life, and I’ll just have to accept it”, I thought. However, having been kept heavily sedated for some time, I have no idea how long, I started to get some strength back. When I could get out of bed, I was encouraged to go with other patients to this Alcoholics Anonymous meeting being held in the hospital.
I didn’t know that the man who put me into the hospital was a member, but I knew he had got off the drink and this time somehow, he was staying off it. I hated him. He was at the meeting when I went in and I certainly couldn’t believe that all these smart, clean and well-dressed people had ever known a good drink – there were women in the group too.
When the meeting started, I couldn’t believe that my pal could sink so low as to tell all those strangers about my life and my drinking. They were all speaking about me and they had no right to do so. Those hearty jovial people talking about shakes, sweats, blackouts, fear, loneliness, debt, trouble at home, trouble at work, bile, DTs. There wasn’t one of them knew anything about these things, but I did.
Stay away from one drink for one day for oneself and you won’t get drunk! What planet were they on? If it was that simple the great ‘I’ would have thought of that long ago.
Well, if you have decided you want what we have – that is where it all begins and once I got my life manageable again I was able to recognise that I had always been powerless over alcohol. Then a day at a time and regular attendance at meetings, joining a group, getting a sponsor and working at the 12 Step Programme of recovery.
Yes, I have become one of those hearty jovial people whose primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.
It all started for me with that first meeting.
It can for you too.
Douglas
Inverness Steps and Tradtions, Sunday