A Miracle
WHEN you think you have nothing to write about and everything to gain, get a pencil and a piece of paper and see what happens. I’ve been blessed, having the shield of Alcoholics Anonymous to fend off my lifelong enemy – alcohol. I used to say, “Then I became an alcoholic.” It was only years later that I that I realised that I’ve been an alcoholic all my life, it just played me along until it was ready to pounce.
I have listened to people say that they drank from day one, be they 4, 14 or 40 years old. I had tasted alcohol from a young age with no ill effect. My move to spirits was in my mid-thirties when I converted from less potent alcohol with a vengeance. However, I did get drunk over Christmas when I was 16. Apart from ‘never again’, which later became a regular utterance, there were no ill effects, no sign of the coming storm. I was, on the outside, a normal teenager. I played cricket and cycled as a tourist, developing a lifelong interest in the landscape, only to lose my interests to alcohol. Thankfully, they have come back to me. I still have a liking for country pubs minus the booze.
Aged 19 I joined the RAF; I took to it like a duck to water. I think that’s when the slow journey to alcoholism began. I loved the taste of my regular pints and became a staunch member of a group which issues a ‘best pub’ guide – such was my dedication. As I progressed in my career, so did my drinking, still only pints but nagging doubts began to form. I was becoming aware that my friends were changing, like me they became dads, married, and settled down. I was becoming the odd one out. I have to say that I’m still married to the same girl.
I went to Belgium on a special posting; it nearly killed me. One thing I’m not used to is doing nothing, and there was a lot of that. It is a drinking culture and that was where I started drinking spirits. The next ten years were a nightmare, a constant battle, but I survived though I came out ill-equipped for civvy street. I continued my battle until Alcoholics Anonymous was mentioned by a crisis charity.
The rest is a miracle called Alcoholics Anonymous.
PETER R, Colwyn Bay