A principled life

I was like a lot of new AA members I have met - full of pride, fear and anger.  What I wanted, I wanted now and at any cost. Life had to be on my terms alone. When I was thwarted, I could turn into an even more selfish monster. Although the obsession to drink had immediately been lifted, it took me quite a while to understand what was going on around me in AA meetings.  I didn’t understand when older members talked about the ‘we’ of AA.  But as I started to grow in recovery through the Steps, I began to understand me, my character and the consequences of my selfish life.  I also started to realise that I was happier when I made the effort to take others into consideration and not barge through life in hobnail boots. I was told that in learning about my true self I would be given the tools to change.  By that time, I knew I wanted and needed to change.  I just had to remember that the timeframe was not my own - to keep doing the footwork and being patient.

From my early months I was involved in service.  Learning about my defects and working with others in service helped me to start to grow up.  Once I had digested the Steps and was doing my best to live them, quite naturally the Fellowship of AA became primary, with my personal recovery in second place.  I need AA more that it needs me! And so, our common welfare has become paramount to me, I know I can be secure in my relationship with the Fellowship IF I keep the groups’ best interest at heart.  I don’t know it all.  But if the groups’ plan seems designed to benefit the greatest number of members, I can usually support it.  Our common endeavour is the most important element in my relationship with other AAs.

I’ve learned and am still learning; I have been able to use these lessons beyond my AA life - across that bridge. This Tradition has given me the ability to listen with an open mind; to accept the majority view and not insist on ‘my way’; to share my experience, strength and hope - and not withhold it, I have a willingness to serve and to look for the greater good in a situation.
Tradition One has helped me to learn to live a principled life. A healthier one - one that is free of guilt and my shortcomings.  It gives me assurance of direction and offers me a completeness I could never have imagined.

HELEN S