The Probation Service approached the Probation and Community Justice Subcommittee to find a member to share their experience of working with probation while also engaging with Alcoholics Anonymous. Its goal was to feature the story on the Probation Service intranet, to raise awareness of the positive experience AA can be for people on probation.

John agreed to an interview. Names have been changed throughout for anonymity.

John, on Probation:

John first got in trouble with the law when he was just five years old. Following support from Probation and Alcoholics Anonymous he has enrolled in adult education, and is looking forward to a new future.

John successfully completed a 30-month Community Order in November 2023, which he received for Assault by Beating, and Criminal Damage, following a domestic dispute.

John first got into trouble for breaking into garages when he was five. He struggled at school. His mum left when he was a teenager. He received the first of many prison sentences at 17, for Grievous Bodily Harm after a violent attack in a pub fight.

It wasn’t until later in life John realised many of his problems stemmed from alcohol.

He said: “Whenever I experienced confrontation or a loss of control I’d erupt into anger.

“I’ve come to realise it was fear that lay behind so many of my responses.

“I was fearful that I wasn’t clever enough or smart enough or good enough, and my response to that was to be cocky and arrogant. Drink covered all that up.”

John said: “Whenever I started drinking, I’d almost always drink until I blacked out.”

He also said: “Probation was just another authority figure that I dealt with because I had to. Nothing sank in.”

John, by then a father of three, was introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous by a friend after another run-in with the law involving drink and drugs and aggressive behaviour during a domestic dispute. AA is free to attend and has no waiting list.

He said: “I met these two guys who had been sober for years. What they said made so much sense, and the first AA meeting I went to was a revelation.

“Up until then, my whole social environment consisted of people who took drink and drugs to cope pretty much every day. That was my ‘normal.’

“People were talking about their fears. And the penny finally dropped for me. I’d always felt different and isolated, but here I felt understood.” John stopped drinking on August 12, 2022.

John also began to respond positively to probation, both by engaging in the offending behaviour programme Building Better Relationships (BBR), and forming bonds with his probation officers.

He said: “I had a fantastic BBR facilitator. He really understood where I was coming from, and I trusted him. He didn’t judge me but listened to me.”

John went to family court and told the judge that he wanted to get better before attempting to vary custody rights.

He said: “I realised I needed to be more at peace with who I was and the things I’ve done. It’s tough because I miss my son, but this situation is a result of things I’ve done.”

Sam is the probation officer who supervised John. He said: “Sam is absolutely fantastic. She stood up to me when I was resistant, but when she could see that I was trying she came along to an AA meeting in her own time to learn more about my world and how alcoholics function.

“I find it hard putting into words what that meant to me. Sam moved me by her compassion and her honesty.

“I feel absolute respect for Sam. I could see she wasn’t doing this job for the pay, but she could also see that – day by day – I am trying to be a better person.”

Sam – John’s Probation Officer:

Sam praised John for the progress he has made, which she said began in earnest after he was convicted for drink driving during his order.

She added: “From that point, John realised he had to stop drinking and he embraced all the support we offered, did really well at BBR and also re-engaged with AA.

“The change in him is massive. He knew it was his responsibility to address his anger and trauma, and to his immense credit he has done exactly that.”

AA hosts ‘Open Meetings’ to raise awareness about their approach.

Sam said: “I don’t have lived experience of addiction, so I felt I owed it to the people I supervise to attend an open AA meeting.

“I really do feel every probation officer should do their best to go, it helped me to understand what AA does and the strong sense of community which it creates.”

John said: “I think most people on probation have an ‘ism’ of some kind, mine is alcoholism.

“Learning more about these conditions is in everybody’s interest, and ultimately will help colleagues know whether or not to refer people to places like AA.”

John faced his biggest fear in 2022 after re-enrolling at school and has since completed his Level 2 maths and hopes to soon complete his English Level 2 before starting an Open University degree.

John added: “Stopping drinking is only the first step in recovery, educating ourselves, developing our consciousness and finding emotional sobriety is what recovery is all about today.”

The Probation and Community Justice Subcommittee would love to hear from Alcoholics Anonymous members who have been involved with Probation and Community Justice Services.

If you’d like to share how your experience with those services has supported you in your recovery, please get in touch at: [email protected]