Silly Season Survival
GOD willing, this should be my 15th sober Christmas. The last drinking one I will never forget.
Start planning early: Christmas starts in October, so I need to start early too! All social occasions must have an exit plan as recommended in ‘Living Sober’ - an excellent book that I advise all newcomers to read again and again as it is full of useful advice and suggestions.
Be careful what you agree to: I am extremely careful, where I go and what I agree to do and with whom. Remember "No" is not a four-letter word. If it sounds like a problem then it probably will be.
Be prepared for the unexpected: Every year my Boss gives me a bottle despite knowing that I do not drink. My employers always give me a Christmas hamper with two bottles of wine. My plan to deal with these presents is to give them away. I stop in at non-AA friends’ homes on the way home and leave them outside the front door if necessary. I try never to take them home with me.
Maintain a programme of complete vigilance in all social occasions: This is a good idea all year round, not just Christmas and New Year). In my early years of sobriety, I went to a company Christmas lunch, walked in the door and was greeted by a young lady who tried to hand me a glass of orange liquid. I asked her what it was. She said, "Champagne and orange juice." I refused it so she said, "Have this one instead." And passed me an identical glass with only orange juice in it. It’s shocking how easy it is to make a mistake.
Watch your glass at parties: Never accept random drinks unless you see them poured. Get a clean glass if necessary or just leave. Nobody cares after they have had a few drinks.
Non-alcoholic beer is not alcohol free: It is 0.1%. I always tell AAs that it is called non-alcoholic because it is not for alcoholics. It is much safer to stick to alcohol-free wine (ie grape juice) and alcohol-free cider (ie apple juice).
Don’t get caught up in other people’s drinking plans: People talk about drinking more than doing it. They start chatting, planning and ribbing each other in October for events in December.
The folks in my office know I don’t drink and I take my car to the Christmas lunch (very handy non-drinking excuse and escape plan). One Christmas, they asked me to drop them at the pub after the meal for their ‘drinking session’. No problem, happy to help as long as I don’t have to go to the pub too. I dropped them off at 3.30pm. Their wives came to collect them at 5.00pm!!! The same afternoon!! They spent longer talking about it than drinking!
Family plans: This is always the hardest. I am fortunate that most of my family don’t drink and I just avoid the ones that do at Christmas. I always remember to take my Big Book and the ‘Just for Today’ card where ever I go to stay overnight. and I go to a meeting - No Matter What. Sobriety comes first because they would never see me at Christmas again if I drink.
Holiday: This is a cunning way to avoid the whole issue. I always go to a meeting wherever I am in the world but I have sponsored some very intelligent blokes who were unable to search for ‘AA, meeting and wherever they were going’, on the internet. I have no idea where they are now.
Remember: It's just another day and don't forget to pray.
I hope and pray we make it to January. You, me and our Higher Power. It always shocks me how many new faces there are in the AA Rooms in January. But I hope that we will be there together.
LB, Poole Dorset.