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My First Convention

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I phoned the AA Telephone Helpline in May 1993 because my drinking had escalated again despite all my efforts to keep it under control. I was taken to a meeting that night and the next day a very lovely lady came to see me and talked about her drinking, how she had stopped and more importantly, stayed stopped. What she said made perfect sense to me because I knew by this time that I couldn’t get better by myself and we started going to meetings together. I followed her like a puppy, terrified that I would lift a drink because I was desperate to stay sober. I listened to everything people shared at meetings and after three months, realising that I needed to get to work, I asked her to be my sponsor and she took me through the Twelve Step Programme of Recovery.

My sponsor had a wide circle of female friends in AA and I became part of that group – although unwillingly at first because I wasn’t comfortable letting people into my solitary life. Amongst others there was an Ellen, a Helen, an Aileen and an Eileen and people at meetings rarely worked out who was who! Later that year I was told a group of ladies were booking to go to a convention in the Lake District in February and it was suggested I joined them. Now when I agreed to do that, I was still unsure because I realised I was going to have company for three whole days and I didn’t think I could handle that. However, I was still willing to do anything and everything to enhance my early sobriety – so I went.

What an experience. The people were lovely, we were arranged in groups of 8-10 (which was perfect) and we met three times every day throughout that long weekend to share our experience, strength and hope. The examples and messages were powerful and having struggled to share at big meetings, I began to relax because I think, I was in a small group. We socialised at meal times, went shopping in Windermere, drove around sight-seeing and in the evenings there was entertainment arranged. I had a wonderful time and I remember laughing more than I had laughed in years. I feel quite emotional right now just thinking about it because I’d forgotten how to really laugh! One afternoon a friend of my sponsor gave me a little cuddly toy as a memento of my first convention and that little rabbit sits on my bedside table so that I see her first thing every morning.

On the Sunday evening I drove home on a high and I remember going into a supermarket to buy a couple of things and as I walked out of the shop, I realised that I’d better get home quickly because I was exhausted. I felt as if I’d been turned inside out over that weekend and I knew that I had finally let go of so much hurt, confusion and fear. I knew that AA was the place for me and over the years that feeling has never left me. I owe the life I have today to Alcoholics Anonymous and the people who have helped me over the years and I have sponsored others to try to give back what was so willingly given to me. I have attended more conventions over the years and I always come home on the same high, happy and rejuvenated. If you ever get the opportunity, please jump at the chance to attend as many conventions as you can. My next goal when we can travel again, is to attend a World Convention which will be another new AA experience – I’ll just have to be patient.

Moira

Cumbernauld Friday